Jokes

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Bushman
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Re: Jokes

Post by Bushman »

image.jpeg
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Re: Jokes

Post by Bushman »

With all the talk about Star Wars I thought this would be fun!
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Re: Jokes

Post by heartcut »

Has it's ups and downs.
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Re: Jokes

Post by thecroweater »

Heard she goes down for anyone on the press of a button, anyways heard they parted ways, she's the excavator now
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Re: Jokes

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image.jpeg
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kiwi Bruce
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Re: Jokes

Post by kiwi Bruce »

Like this one! !
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Bushman
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Re: Jokes

Post by Bushman »

image.jpeg
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Re: Jokes

Post by Bushman »

Hope this photo isn't shocking to some!
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WooTeck
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Re: Jokes

Post by WooTeck »

Bushman wrote:Hope this photo isn't shocking to some!
image.jpeg
im sure there will be some resitance to bad puns like that
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HDNB
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Re: Jokes

Post by HDNB »

WooTeck wrote:
Bushman wrote:Hope this photo isn't shocking to some!
image.jpeg
im sure there will be some resitance to bad puns like that
no kidding. some guys will get really amped up over electrifying images like that. Overload their circuits and blow a load.
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WooTeck
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Re: Jokes

Post by WooTeck »

HDNB wrote:
WooTeck wrote:
Bushman wrote:Hope this photo isn't shocking to some!
image.jpeg
im sure there will be some resitance to bad puns like that
no kidding. some guys will get really amped up over electrifying images like that. Overload their circuits and blow a load.
i think ill have to pay ohmage to those puns
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WooTeck
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Re: Jokes

Post by WooTeck »

i feel this here is currently getting out of hand.
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Kegg_jam
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Re: Jokes

Post by Kegg_jam »

I don't see watt is so funny
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Halfbaked
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Re: Jokes

Post by Halfbaked »

She really should not have dogged him like that. Good ones Bushman
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Re: Jokes

Post by ranger_ric »

Husband and Wife Christmas Shopping
A couple were in a busy shopping center just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, so she called him on the mobile.
The wife said " Where are you, you know we have lots to do."
He said "You remember the jewelers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?"
Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all
choked up…
"Yes, I do remember that shop." she replied.
"Well I am in the gun shop next door to that."
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heynonny
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Re: Jokes

Post by heynonny »

ohmmmmmm.jpg
  
 
 
       Oh,look!! Its a hole in the space-time contuum!!
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Re: Jokes

Post by likkerlover »

why don't chickens wear pants?
because their pecker is on their face
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Re: Jokes

Post by Haus »

Not a joke, just an amusing story from work.

Had a gal a work that let's just say had a full six pack but lacked the plastic thingy that holds them together.

So one day at lunch she inquired about Spam. Between me and two other guys we began to explain the history of Spam starting "The Great Spamel Drives" of the late 1800's in New Mexico. How they were hunted to near extinction much like the Buffalo and that hunting them now is illegal. But the funniest part, besides she bought it hook, line and sinker, swallowed it, all the way down to the gut, she started telling everyone else what she just found out.
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Re: Jokes

Post by Bushman »

As many of you know my son just bought a new home. Before buying I drew up a plan for a new home that I thought was the perfect design.
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Post by frodo »

His name was Bubba, he was from Texas ... And he needed a loan, So...
He walked into a bank in New York City and asked for the loan Officer. He told the loan officer that he was going to Paris for an International Redneck Festival for two weeks and needed to borrow $5,000, and that he was not a depositor of the bank.

The bank officer told him that the bank would need some form of security for the loan, so the Redneck handed over the keys to a new Ferrari. The car was
parked on the street in front of the bank.

The Redneck produced the title and everything checked out. The loan officer agreed to hold the car as collateral for the loan and apologized for having to charge 12% interest.
Later, the bank's president and its officers all enjoyed a good laugh
at the Redneck from the Texas for using a $250,000 Ferrari as
collateral for a $5,000 loan.

An employee of the bank then drove the Ferrari into the bank's private underground garage and parked it.
Two weeks later, the Redneck returned, repaid the $5,000 and the interest of 23.07. The loan officer said, "Sir, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.

While you were away, we checked you out on Dunn & Bradstreet and found that you are a distinguished alumni from Texas A & M, a highly sophisticated investor and multi-millionaire with real estate and financial interests all over the world. Your investments include a large number of wind turbines around Sweetwater, Texas. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow $5,000?"

The good 'ole boy replied, "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two weeks for only $23.07 and expect it to be there when I return?"

His name was BUBBA.... Keep an eye on those Texas boys!
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Re: Jokes

Post by FreeMountainHermit »

HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!!

https://www.facebook.com/51045534565890 ... 8/?fref=nf" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" rel="nofollow
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Re: Jokes

Post by frodo »

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WooTeck
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Re: Jokes

Post by WooTeck »

Bushman wrote:As many of you know my son just bought a new home. Before buying I drew up a plan for a new home that I thought was the perfect design.
Image
near perfect... im not a fan of climbing through windows.
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Re: Jokes

Post by der wo »

WooTeck wrote:near perfect... im not a fan of climbing through windows.
But why go out? All you need is there.
In this way, imperialism brings catastrophe as a mode of existence back from the periphery of capitalist development to its point of departure. - Rosa Luxemburg
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WooTeck
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Re: Jokes

Post by WooTeck »

der wo wrote:
WooTeck wrote:near perfect... im not a fan of climbing through windows.
But why go out? All you need is there.
its more of a question of getting in
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Re: Jokes

Post by der wo »

WooTeck wrote:
der wo wrote:
WooTeck wrote:near perfect... im not a fan of climbing through windows.
But why go out? All you need is there.
its more of a question of getting in
Yes. And sometimes you want a visit from a woman. But I would like to see her climbing through a window.
In this way, imperialism brings catastrophe as a mode of existence back from the periphery of capitalist development to its point of departure. - Rosa Luxemburg
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Re: Jokes

Post by Rastus »

Ok i am a little late or awfully early take your pick...


which reindeer do dinosaurs hate the most?




scroll down










Comet! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Jokes

Post by ranger_ric »

Big city teacher gets a job in rural Alabama. One room school, all grades...
Teacher can't get any of these kids to learn basic math so she tries a new tack..."If there are 3 crows on a telephone line and a farmer comes out and shoots one, how many are left?"
Troublesome kid says "none". She replies "3 minus 1 is 2...why don't you get that?". Kid says if you shoot one the other two will fly away...Teacher says, Ok, not the answer I was looking for, but I like the way you think.

Kid says, hey can i ask you a question? Teacher says ok... "If there are three women walking through town eating ice cream cones and one is licking around the base, another across the tip and one has the whole thing in her mouth...which one is married? She says, i don't know...the one with the whole thing in her mouth?

Kid says, no, the one with the wedding ring....But I like the way YOU think!
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Re: Jokes

Post by FreeMountainHermit »

Most common bra size at the old folks home.

38 long.
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Re: Jokes

Post by FreeMountainHermit »

Summer day drinkin'
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