My Dad was wrong!
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My Dad was wrong!
As a young man my father told me, "Son, no man has ever been shot by a woman while doin' dishes."
I took this to mean that at least while in the act of helpin' with household chores, men would be treated kindly by women.
Either I completely misunderstood him, or he was wrong.
This mornin' I woke in a good mood 'cause I had the day off. I made a press-pot of home-roasted coffee, and served it to my special woman in bed. I told her I loved her and gave her a kiss.
Back in the kitchen I made breakfast and called her to the table, served breakfast and ate with her.
After breakfast I took the dogs out, took the garbage out, and then started to do yesterdays and todays dishes. Part way through the dishes I asked her specifics on how to clean one of her bakin' stones. I was given lengthy, detailed directions on how to clean it. I thought about her directions, and asked her, "So all I really gotta do is clean it without soap, right?" I was told: yes.
As I started to clean it she yelled at me, "Yer doin' it wrong! I just told you to...(at this point my blood pressure rose and I don't know what else she said). My mind flashed back to my father's words all those years ago. I asked her, "Do you realise yer yellin' at me while I'm doin' the dishes? This might not be in yer best interest." I don't remember her reply, but it was LOUD.
I got frustrated and took the easy, wussy way out. I said, "Fuck these dishes.", in a soft voice and walked outta the room.
I'm thinkin' and thinkin' on this, and not comin' to any conclusions. I know it's wrong to cuss and walk away, but was I completely wrong? Would you wise gentlemen please give me some words of advice?
I took this to mean that at least while in the act of helpin' with household chores, men would be treated kindly by women.
Either I completely misunderstood him, or he was wrong.
This mornin' I woke in a good mood 'cause I had the day off. I made a press-pot of home-roasted coffee, and served it to my special woman in bed. I told her I loved her and gave her a kiss.
Back in the kitchen I made breakfast and called her to the table, served breakfast and ate with her.
After breakfast I took the dogs out, took the garbage out, and then started to do yesterdays and todays dishes. Part way through the dishes I asked her specifics on how to clean one of her bakin' stones. I was given lengthy, detailed directions on how to clean it. I thought about her directions, and asked her, "So all I really gotta do is clean it without soap, right?" I was told: yes.
As I started to clean it she yelled at me, "Yer doin' it wrong! I just told you to...(at this point my blood pressure rose and I don't know what else she said). My mind flashed back to my father's words all those years ago. I asked her, "Do you realise yer yellin' at me while I'm doin' the dishes? This might not be in yer best interest." I don't remember her reply, but it was LOUD.
I got frustrated and took the easy, wussy way out. I said, "Fuck these dishes.", in a soft voice and walked outta the room.
I'm thinkin' and thinkin' on this, and not comin' to any conclusions. I know it's wrong to cuss and walk away, but was I completely wrong? Would you wise gentlemen please give me some words of advice?
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
My wife is OCD. Everything has one way to be done. And only one. So when she sees I'm not doing things HER way I politely remind her that I am helping her. But if she rather she can do it herself and I'll go have some fun. Amazingly she still wants to do it her self. So I go have fun. So I feel your pain.
Where you right? Well you weren't wrong but probably could have handled it a little better but it us what it is. Some folks see only whats not done. The one thing you didn't do, not the 99 things you did do. But we love them anyways.
Where you right? Well you weren't wrong but probably could have handled it a little better but it us what it is. Some folks see only whats not done. The one thing you didn't do, not the 99 things you did do. But we love them anyways.
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
What I would have done is simply stopped washing her stone and keep on with the dishes. I get pretty prickly if my wife buggers up my nicely seasoned cast iron pans, so now I ask her to just leave them alone and I take care of them myself. The same way I seem to always bugger up her clothes when I do the laundry. I pretty well always get it wrong, so now I just stay away and work around them. I'm thinking Détente.I know it's wrong to cuss and walk away, but was I completely wrong? Would you wise gentlemen please give me some words of advice?
I do all my own stunts
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
All I can say is my woman is very bitchy about her baking stones. So I stay away from em.
The stone age didn't end due to a lack of stones
Re: My Dad was wrong!
I probably would have mumbled that I was off to dig a another shallow grave as I left the room, but that's just me... I don't do getting yelled at these days... I live with one of those OCD women and I just don't let her get started...
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
Every time my wife asks me to do the dishes.
I hand her the chainsaw...........shes getting real good at it.
Better than I am with dishes.
I hand her the chainsaw...........shes getting real good at it.
Better than I am with dishes.
Daddy used, to say " Any landing you can walk away from is a good one"
Calculations don't mean shit when compared to the real world practical experience of many...RAD 9/2010
Calculations don't mean shit when compared to the real world practical experience of many...RAD 9/2010
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
I think you did okay. I have learned to bite my lip smile and walk away. She gets that she crossed a line. At least you didn’t yell.
My live in girlfriend is also OCD and lives to clean the house. She will actually get out of bed early to sweep the kitchen floor and do dishes before she goes to work. Damn I love that! She will get the dishes in and out of the dishwasher before I can get to them. The laundry barley hits the floor before it is clean and folded. (and she is beautiful)
Only problem. While she is OCD, I am anal. I will take out all the silverware that she just heaves into the drawer and organize it accordingly. Pisses her off. Among other things we go through that a couple times a week.
I have learned to keep my mouth shut and smile.
My live in girlfriend is also OCD and lives to clean the house. She will actually get out of bed early to sweep the kitchen floor and do dishes before she goes to work. Damn I love that! She will get the dishes in and out of the dishwasher before I can get to them. The laundry barley hits the floor before it is clean and folded. (and she is beautiful)
Only problem. While she is OCD, I am anal. I will take out all the silverware that she just heaves into the drawer and organize it accordingly. Pisses her off. Among other things we go through that a couple times a week.
I have learned to keep my mouth shut and smile.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
I have been blamed for moving knick knacks on tables and shelves, like I don't have anything better to do... So now I purposely move things just a little bit to see if she'll notice... Hey, if I'm gonna get blamed for something I might as well be guilty... Gonna look for a girlfriend on the side next because I've been accused of already having one of those just about long enough...
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
THM:
Here's one of life's lessons that I've learned through three marriages.
When it comes to marriage, you can be right, OR you can be happy, but not both. It's your choice.
The first two times I picked, "I'm right", my third marriage I picked, "I want to be happy". We've been married for 22 years.
(No) Bull.
Here's one of life's lessons that I've learned through three marriages.
When it comes to marriage, you can be right, OR you can be happy, but not both. It's your choice.
The first two times I picked, "I'm right", my third marriage I picked, "I want to be happy". We've been married for 22 years.
(No) Bull.
Life is hard, it's harder when you're stupid...
Re: My Dad was wrong!
OK, my best man at my wedding 30 years ago gave me this advice: He said on the first night home have a great dinner with the fancy dishes your wife picked out for wedding gifts, then volunteer to wash the dishes at the end of the dinner. As your washing the dishes my best man said drop one of those expensive plates and you will never have to be in the kitchen again. I was too cheap and have been washing dishes for 30 years
Re: My Dad was wrong!
Id say your encroaching into "her domain" not good territory to be in unsupervised.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
I wash the dishes because I want them to be clean... My ex-wife couldn't get them clean, nor can my current significant other, so if I don't want greasy left-overs stuck on everything I just do them myself because I can get them clean on the first try rather than requiring 2 - 3 washings...Bushman wrote:OK, my best man at my wedding 30 years ago gave me this advice: He said on the first night home have a great dinner with the fancy dishes your wife picked out for wedding gifts, then volunteer to wash the dishes at the end of the dinner. As your washing the dishes my best man said drop one of those expensive plates and you will never have to be in the kitchen again. I was too cheap and have been washing dishes for 30 years
Re: My Dad was wrong!
I got rid of my "significant other" eight years ago. Since then I wash dishes to my satisfaction, my house is cleaned when I want it to be, I've always washed my own clothes, the only one who moves any nick-nacks is my grandson. I have a distillery in my kitchen. My closet is a grain bin. I get on my motorcycle and go when ever/where ever I want. I haven't been bitched at in eight years, least wise not that I had to listen to. I'm happier now than ever in my life. When I was married, seemed that whatever was never good enough, it was always sumpin'. Bless those of you who have a good woman but I'm perfectly happy without!!
Big R
Big R
"Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves." William Pitt
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
I strongly agree with dunder's wisdom.
Simple potstiller. Slow, single run.
(50 litre, propane heated pot still. Coil in bucket condenser - No thermometer, No carbon)
The Reading Lounge AND the Rules We Live By should be compulsory reading
Cumudgeon and loving it.
(50 litre, propane heated pot still. Coil in bucket condenser - No thermometer, No carbon)
The Reading Lounge AND the Rules We Live By should be compulsory reading
Cumudgeon and loving it.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
Its just a no win situation more often than not.
Get put in a position to be set up for failure.
They demonize you for standing your ground.Or they are contemptuous and loath to be benevolent to you for being a mindful soldier.
Had to be addicted to the dad bern plumbing didn't cha?
Displaced aggression anyone?
Sorry for not being helpful.
Get put in a position to be set up for failure.
They demonize you for standing your ground.Or they are contemptuous and loath to be benevolent to you for being a mindful soldier.
Had to be addicted to the dad bern plumbing didn't cha?
Displaced aggression anyone?
Sorry for not being helpful.
Trample the injured and hurdle the dead.
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
Ya know holy, to answer the question of whether you were wrong to do what you did or not... I dont believe you were. I consider myself to be rather mild tempered, especially with the woman. But when doing good, I mean really good. Like you were, a man dont expect to be blasted for it. My thought is, she is thinking about it (what she did/said) as much as you, and she will come to her senses and apologize. So no, I dont think you were in the wrong. Lotsa guys wouldnt have even done what you did. And If they did.. and she did that... Boy, there would have been hell to pay.
-Control Freak-
AKA MulekickerHDbrownNose
AKA MulekickerHDbrownNose
Re: My Dad was wrong!
""So all I really gotta do is clean it without soap, right?" I was told: yes."
not as far as I know,there is two ways of using ,one is with soaking
with water this "steams" whatever your cooking, the other is to soak
with oil then it becomes like "non stick" but as the stones are porous
you should not use soap on either one.treat much
as you mite cast iron,just wipe out.if anything stuck soak in water
then if necessary use a soft scrubber.
not as far as I know,there is two ways of using ,one is with soaking
with water this "steams" whatever your cooking, the other is to soak
with oil then it becomes like "non stick" but as the stones are porous
you should not use soap on either one.treat much
as you mite cast iron,just wipe out.if anything stuck soak in water
then if necessary use a soft scrubber.
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
Hey Mulekicker... yer a fricken prophet! An oricle!
It took her hours to chill out, but once she did, she apologised.
She asked me if I "wanted to talk about it". She knows I'm happiest when I get to talk stuff out, and I know she doesn't like to talk things out, so I told her "only if you want to." She didn't, and I think I earned points... all I know is she gave it to me REAL good last night.
I mentioned to her that I asked yall for advice. She was curious about the advice I was given.
I told her bullrider's philosophy. She loved the idea that she would ALWAYS be right, and I'd have to capitulate. I told her to forget the idea... if I wasn't gonna be an equal partner then I was gonna not be a partner at all.
I told her that two of the older gentlemen (who's opinions I held in high regard) [Dunder and Blanik] said I was encroachin' on her territory and that I should leave all the kitchen work to her. I thought she was gonna cry until she was sure that I wasn't gonna do that. I cook regularly and she likes what I cook. I also bake all the time and she is addicted to my fruit pies, cobblers, bread, and particularly my double chocolate caramel brownies.
Larry, she told me to tell you not to let girls hear yer opinion of them.
Heh
It took her hours to chill out, but once she did, she apologised.
She asked me if I "wanted to talk about it". She knows I'm happiest when I get to talk stuff out, and I know she doesn't like to talk things out, so I told her "only if you want to." She didn't, and I think I earned points... all I know is she gave it to me REAL good last night.
I mentioned to her that I asked yall for advice. She was curious about the advice I was given.
I told her bullrider's philosophy. She loved the idea that she would ALWAYS be right, and I'd have to capitulate. I told her to forget the idea... if I wasn't gonna be an equal partner then I was gonna not be a partner at all.
I told her that two of the older gentlemen (who's opinions I held in high regard) [Dunder and Blanik] said I was encroachin' on her territory and that I should leave all the kitchen work to her. I thought she was gonna cry until she was sure that I wasn't gonna do that. I cook regularly and she likes what I cook. I also bake all the time and she is addicted to my fruit pies, cobblers, bread, and particularly my double chocolate caramel brownies.
Larry, she told me to tell you not to let girls hear yer opinion of them.
Heh
Re: My Dad was wrong!
A wise move, but... why are we always expected to do that? Why can't they?mash rookie wrote:I have learned to keep my mouth shut and smile.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
Way to go mackrel. Glad it worked out.
Years ago, soon after we got together, I was helping in the kitchen and washed about three generations of seasoning out of her grandma's cast iron skillet. That is a lesson I shall never forget.
Years ago, soon after we got together, I was helping in the kitchen and washed about three generations of seasoning out of her grandma's cast iron skillet. That is a lesson I shall never forget.
Braz
Re: My Dad was wrong!
My apologies to you and your most special lady friend If I spoke too frankly.
No moral offense intended.
No moral offense intended.
Trample the injured and hurdle the dead.
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
The way I see it is this, It's your fault you where doing the dishes wrong. Ya you where trying to be nice but really you should thank her for yelling at you, it was the best thing that could have happened, you just saved yourself a whole lot of work.
Here's the deal, if you do it right it's going to be your job forever and you don't want that job. I think your father was right for the most part but choosing dishes or being shot isn't much of a choice.
Here's the deal, if you do it right it's going to be your job forever and you don't want that job. I think your father was right for the most part but choosing dishes or being shot isn't much of a choice.
Ideas are like rabbits. You get a couple and learn how to handle them, and pretty soon you have a dozen. John Steinbeck
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
Doing the dishes right in our house is called foreplay
TAF
TAF
We haven't got the money so now we have to think
Build it, don't buy it
Build it, don't buy it
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
No worries, Larry. She was just jokin' with ya.LWTCS wrote:My apologies to you and your most special lady friend If I spoke too frankly.
No moral offense intended.
What she actually said was "Larry will get more sex if he doesn't let women know his opinion of them." She said it with a devilish smile.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
Oh for heavens sakes, l don't dare speak to my missuus that kind of barb on my tongue as i am addicted to the plumbing:-\
Trample the injured and hurdle the dead.
Re: My Dad was wrong!
What is the old saying "Damned if you do and damned if you don't"!
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Re: My Dad was wrong!
i would have to say your dad was right, as you get older, you get wiser.
you washed the dishes and you didnt get shot, what happened, i'll use your words here.
'I earned points... all I know is she gave it to me REAL good last night.'
you washed the dishes and you didnt get shot, what happened, i'll use your words here.
'I earned points... all I know is she gave it to me REAL good last night.'
i luv makin booz.