The liar's bench

Little or nothing to do with distillation.

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Re: The liar's bench

Post by HDNB »

goinbroke2 wrote: Sat Apr 10, 2021 2:52 pm I like goats, goats are cool.
Ahh...nova scotia....land of the east coast lifestyle. Where men are men and goats are scared.
I finally quit drinking for good.

now i drink for evil.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by Setsumi »

CoogeeBoy wrote: Sat Apr 10, 2021 6:50 pm
goinbroke2 wrote: Sat Apr 10, 2021 2:52 pm I like goats, goats are cool. Had rabbits, chickens, cows but goats were my favourite.
That reminds me of the time I went to a conference on the supernatural, you know spirits, the occult and all that stuff.
I was sitting in the audience and the fella running the show asked us all to stand up, so we all did.
He then said "If any of you have seen a ghost, please stay standing, otherwise sit down." so I sat down with about half the audience.
Then he said "If any of you have ever spoken with a ghost, please stay standing, otherwise, sit down." so about another half sat down you know, leaving about 25% of the audience standing.
Then he asked "Have any of you touched a ghost? IF you have, please stay standing, otherwise sit down". Well there weren't many left standing but then he asked "Have any of you ever had sex with a ghost? and there was only one man left standing right way up the back of the stadium.
The guy running the show said "Sir, can you come down here please" so he did.
When he was on stage, the guy with the microphone said to him "Sir, it is a pleasure to finally meet someone like you, we have never met anyone who has had sex wit a ghost!"
The guy from the back of the stadium said:

"Ghost? I thought you said Goat!"
now that guy is an idiot... sometimes the lie is better than the truth.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

Damn it coogee, I was setting that up for myself!
Lol!!

HDNB, grew up for the most part in Chatham and all my mother’s relatives are near Saint John. NS is only because the wife if from here.

(Course I didn’t deny anything....) 😂

Edit: I’m assuming your handle is Home Distiller New Brunswick?
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

What is wrong with people??????
I stopped at McDonald’s about 20 minutes ago to get some dinner while in town. This woman cuts across two lanes of traffic to get in line for the drive through ahead of me. Since I’m already turning right and obviously ahead of her I nosed in which left the ass of her car across the lane as well as the suicide lane in the middle. She’s honking the horn and freaking out at me so I gave her a long unemotional stare. That REALLY pissed her off!!
I order and the whole time I’m talking she’s yelling and honking, bad enough the girl working keeps asking “pardon? Did you say something?”
I finally get to the window to pay and I say “I’m also paying for the order behind me. As I’m waiting before the next window to pick up she stops honking and is avoiding me looking at her in the mirror, no way will she make eye contact.

I got to the window, showed both receipts and took her food too! Frig her, she can wait in line again!

Anybody want a mcchicken meal with large fries and nestle ice tea? 😆
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by River Rat »

I sure thought that story was headed in a different direction, until the second to last line. That's damn hilarious! Nice work!
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by Setsumi »

goinbroke, that is serious bad ass. can not stop laughing.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by Truckinbutch »

Revenge on Karens is so rewarding .
If you ain't the lead dog in the team , the scenery never changes . Ga Flatwoods made my avatar and I want to thank him for that .
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

What do you call a group of Karen’s?

A HOA.
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Re: The liar's bench

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cob wrote: Tue Dec 15, 2020 12:00 am I ain't getting out of any aircraft that's still working :ewink:
It is fun. First 6 times I flew in a plane I didn't land. the jump instructor had a hardwood stick and he told us all, that once our butt gets out the door of that Cessna 182 the stick was to wack our fingers because we were not coming back in.

Younger then, no money, so pumped plasma twice a week for a couple of months until I could afford to jump.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by subbrew »

corene1 wrote: Mon Nov 02, 2020 6:42 am My son sent me this so I had to share.
DEER HUNTERS.
(A letter from someone who wants to remain anonymous, who farms, writes well and actually tried this)
I had this idea that I could rope a deer, put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. ...
I read that years ago and still laugh until tears flow when I read it.

Thank you all for letting me have a space in the bench
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

Well hell, everyone’s welcome. They got pretty low standard around here, they even let me stay!

Not to sure about any group that has low enough standards to let me stay but there you go!

Ummm, did you finish the bottle that was under the bush over there? Asking for a friend.

I better leave this replacement jug here, new guy seems thirsty...
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

Oh, and don’t fall asleep after chugging likker, that frigging TB will paint your toenails pink. (Don’t ask, it was awkward)
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

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Since I sat down and made a few comments earlier thought I should introduce myself. Only read about 1/3 of the pages so far but certainly reminds me of my youth and family stories.

Although I was not born until the 60s I grew up in 50s. My father cruised along, accepting change, and moving forward until about 59. At that point he decided he had moved far enough, he liked it there. So I grew up in a house that had indoor plumbing but heat was a wood stove. Music was 50s country. Farm machinery was B and A John Deeres with 7 ft bar mowers, things you often spent more time fixing than running. Lived on a small farm with a crick running through it and a mile north my grandparents lived, the same crick running through their place. No one cared much about a kid trespassing back then so I grew up running that mile of crick with a bow, fishing pole, shotgun or .22. [definition of crick - some of you may think I mean creek, but that is a different animal. A creek is a pretty flowing stream of water, often clean and flowing over rocks. A crick is a muddy flowing stream of water which the area cattle all claim as their personal lavatory facility. ]

Parents divorced when I was young and mom moved into town. So during the school year I spent weekdays in town and on the farm on weekends. It was a small town, you knew everyone and everyone knew you. You mess up as a kid in that environment and word of your deeds go home faster than you could. But it was a pretty damn good childhood. We had some fantastic teachers at the school. Out of thirty kids in my class (largest class in the school by half a dozen) we had 4 of us as finalist in the national merit scholarship. So it was not as if we were backwater, just more innocent I guess.

Not a lot to do in such a small town so most of our weekends were spent just driving around, find someone to buy us some beer and then play cat and mouse with the local cop. Sometimes he would catch us and make us pour out our beer, then we had to go home and the game was over for the weekend.

Left there for college after high school. Ended up joining the Navy as a nuke and pushing submarines around the pacific for a few years, then become a system engineer at a DOE reactor for a few before going back to get a masters and getting into software consulting which I have done for the last 20+ years. I now live on 40 acres were I can look out at the Rocky's as I type this.

I will try and drop in now and then with a family story and one of my adventures. Was not as much of a wild man as many of you but I have climbed mountains in the Andes, watched lions in Africa, jumped out of planes and off cliffs, and crumpled up more than one motorcycle so might be able dredge up something interesting.
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Re: The liar's bench

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goinbroke2 wrote: Thu Apr 15, 2021 3:31 am Well hell, everyone’s welcome. They got pretty low standard around here, they even let me stay!

Not to sure about any group that has low enough standards to let me stay but there you go!

Ummm, did you finish the bottle that was under the bush over there? Asking for a friend.

I better leave this replacement jug here, new guy seems thirsty...
As Garth Brooks once said "I've got friends in low places"
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by thecroweater »

Funny how such upbringing seems to attract Stiller's eh. Born in 1970 raised on a farm with Grandpa other Grandpa was on a farm on the opposite side of the river directly across. He was born in 1900 and his father in 1854. I learnt to farm with gear museums were chasing and world views half a century dead. Is in my memory the first colour tv I saw and remember how amazed it was, I worked with guys who fought in the Great war, when to church when women wore hats and gloves and men wore suits. The first car I drove was a 1948 Holden FX ute and the first car I owned was a buckboard 1927 Chevy roadster farm wreck. My dad worked our orchard and farm with Granddad and he broke horses in for neighbours as well as building, he was also a part time pilot. I left school at 15 as was working that same day digging footings. At 17 I went out bush working for the world's largest cattle king's Kiddmans who for all their land were as backward as all hell. I leant there how to harness horses and camels make greenhide rope work with lasoos and bronco horses saw stampedes broke bones lent to hold down scrub bulls to knacker and brand and ride and work Brumbies ( Mustangs) that would soon as kill ya as stand. Had run ins with buffalo, scrub bulls dingos Brumbies and wild camels not to mention Roos and everybody's seen the emu vid. Been shot at and shot back had fights I didn't know if survive. All these and much more and that's before I even start to embellish, been a wild 51 years and the next 51 don't look like slowing. Life is amazing and when things are crook just know this too will pass.
Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety. Benjamin Franklin
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

I keep asking myself, when all of us “doers “ are dead and gone, who will do keep the place running? Kids today certainly don’t have the ambition or “get ‘er done” attitude. All I hear (of course there are exceptions but by far the most common) are “I can’t do that” and “I don’t know”.
It is VERY common for me to quote Henry Ford to kids. “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right”.

I read the rig that hauls the space shuttles in Florida, that was built in the 50’s can’t be rebuilt or duplicated because they “lost the engineering”. How the heck do you lose the engineering??? Even if you reverse engineer it or copy the parts or whatever, there must be a way to build another one but nope, they can’t...

Blows my mind that they can’t and more importantly, that they won’t try!! How did we get to the moon??
“Nah, we can’t do that, too hard...”

I can plumb, do electrical, pour a basement, shingle a roof, build an engine, weld metal, make spirits, heck I can do anything, might not be “professional “ but I can do it.
Kids are like, “put a chain back on a bicycle...I don’t know how” AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

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goinbroke2 wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 7:00 am I keep asking myself, when all of us “doers “ are dead and gone, who will do keep the place running? Kids today certainly don’t have the ambition or “get ‘er done” attitude. All I hear (of course there are exceptions but by far the most common) are “I can’t do that” and “I don’t know”.
It is VERY common for me to quote Henry Ford to kids. “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right”.

I read the rig that hauls the space shuttles in Florida, that was built in the 50’s can’t be rebuilt or duplicated because they “lost the engineering”. How the heck do you lose the engineering??? Even if you reverse engineer it or copy the parts or whatever, there must be a way to build another one but nope, they can’t...

Blows my mind that they can’t and more importantly, that they won’t try!! How did we get to the moon??
“Nah, we can’t do that, too hard...”

I can plumb, do electrical, pour a basement, shingle a roof, build an engine, weld metal, make spirits, heck I can do anything, might not be “professional “ but I can do it.
Kids are like, “put a chain back on a bicycle...I don’t know how” AAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!
There's a generation of parents that are to blame for that generation of kids who "can't ". Too much time in front of the boob-tube and not enough time out in the sand lot developing all the skills and confidence to try something new and learn. My kids are both in their 20s, and the rule growing up was for every hour in front of the TV they wanted, they had to have 3 hours outside first. My yard was once littered with their cobbled construction projects, home made skate boards, bird condominiums, and bat houses, and holes the dug to "the center of the earth".
Fear and ridicule are the tactics of weak-minded cowards and tyrants who have no other leadership talent from which to draw in order to persuade.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by Saltbush Bill »

goinbroke2 wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 7:00 am It is VERY common for me to quote Henry Ford to kids. “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you’re right”.
Hope ya don't mind me taking that away with me , doubt many Aussies have heard it......it rings true and i will use it .
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by Setsumi »

i have 2 kids, my son 26 and daughter 22. if i am busy with a project my son will ask if he can help, no matter what i ask he will not do it. my daughter will ask me money, go and buy stuff and finish a project pretty much on her own. she will also tell you off if you bother her. my son will bring a magazine and ask if the photo can be true, he wont even read his own.... he used to hunt with me untill he realised i will only let him shoot an animal if he put in the work, now it is too big effort. yes, his mom and grandmom did not allow him to do chores, daughter on the other had just did from a young age stuff in and around the house on her own initiative.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

Yup, two boys, 23&19. The older one was big into sports because of his mother, I hate sports. But at 6’4” he was great at basketball and he was/ is a English nerd. Can tell you the square root of a pickle, but can’t get it out of the jar!

Youngest, I gave him a junior dragster for his 10th birthday and we’ve been drag racing since.(moved on to full size cars and now off roads with us too.

Both are quick to “let dad do it because he can do anything “ but I’ve noticed my older (who joined the airforce and works on choppers) has actually matured and now is quicker to try and do stuff. (Even cooking was a no go until he moved out and couldn’t afford to eat out or eat cereal all the time)
The youngest joined the reserves and is a trucker. He too has a bit of my “can do” spirit “ and I hear compliments about his work ethic.

So both are what I would consider “can do” but are also “work smart not hard” that I’ve jammed into them.

Both seem to have matured and are willing to try stuff now that they’ve left the home so I would conclude that yes I did too much for them. My consolation though, is that they’ve had a good role model who was always working and could do everything which will effect them throughout their lives. Youngest seems quick to say “I can do that” if there are others around so that’s nice.

Holy crap, after all that I need a drink.
Huh the jug is still half full.

Nobody else drinking or what???
(I love being retired, day drinking, lol)
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

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thecroweater wrote: Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:35 pm I learnt to farm with gear museums were chasing and world views half a century dead.
Here, have a beer or mead. Sorry no spirits to offer, have not been distilling long enough to have anything aged to offer. That line above is perfect.

I am in the process of recreating that farm on my little acreage. I have a 1941 Case DC 3 which was the tractor my mother learned to drive tractors on. I am restoring a 1940 JD B which my father mowed with as a kid. And two days ago I hauled home a 1955 McCormick model 55W baler I will be restoring. It is just like one my Grandfather had bought new in 55.

That baler taught me what work really was. He liked heavy bales so had it set up to tie 90 lb alfalfa bales. I was 12 or 13 and probably 105 to 110 lbs when I started spending summer days hauling bales onto the rack and taking them to the bale pile. Hope to give a couple of the neighbor kids an opportunity to experience it.
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Re: The liar's bench

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subbrew wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:27 am
thecroweater wrote: Thu Apr 15, 2021 10:35 pm I learnt to farm with gear museums were chasing and world views half a century dead.
Here, have a beer or mead. Sorry no spirits to offer, have not been distilling long enough to have anything aged to offer. That line above is perfect.

I am in the process of recreating that farm on my little acreage. I have a 1941 Case DC 3 which was the tractor my mother learned to drive tractors on. I am restoring a 1940 JD B which my father mowed with as a kid. And two days ago I hauled home a 1955 McCormick model 55W baler I will be restoring. It is just like one my Grandfather had bought new in 55.

That baler taught me what work really was. He liked heavy bales so had it set up to tie 90 lb alfalfa bales. I was 12 or 13 and probably 105 to 110 lbs when I started spending summer days hauling bales onto the rack and taking them to the bale pile. Hope to give a couple of the neighbor kids an opportunity to experience it.
Hell yeah bucking bails and moving sprinkler pipe is hard, rewarding work for kids. Pays decent, builds a strong core, and a hell of a work ethic. I can't count the miles of pipe, or bails of alfalfa and Timothy I moved as a kid, but I aways had a wallet full of cash on the weekends, and a great tan.
Fear and ridicule are the tactics of weak-minded cowards and tyrants who have no other leadership talent from which to draw in order to persuade.
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Re: The liar's bench

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Deplorable wrote: Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:36 am

Hell yeah bucking bails and moving sprinkler pipe is hard, rewarding work for kids. Pays decent, builds a strong core, and a hell of a work ethic. I can't count the miles of pipe, or bails of alfalfa and Timothy I moved as a kid, but I aways had a wallet full of cash on the weekends, and a great tan.
I didn't get all those benefits. Redheaded kid so no tanning going to happen to this white boy. And the pay at grandpas was grandma's cooking. but learned to work with without whining. The only other thing I can think of that hardened me up was working calves. Spend a day vaccinating, cutting, and dehorning 300 to 400 lb calves will teach you that you can take a lot more abuse than you thought. Never been afraid of much after that because outside of Mike Tyson there are few alive that can hit you, kick you, stomp on you, bleed on you, or crap on you more than a couple hundred head of calves.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by goinbroke2 »

Lol, just came in from the garage and the wife was yammering about something, she yelled “you never listen to me, you only hear what you want to hear”!!

So I said “sure I’ll have a beer”

Holy crap is she spitting and sputtering mad now! Out the door and drove away. Guess I’ll have leftovers and go back out to the garage, lol.
Numerous 57L kegs, some propane, one 220v electric with stilldragon controller. Keggle for all-Grain, two pot still tops for whisky, a 3" reflux with deflag for vodka. Coming up, a 4" perf plate column. Life is short, make whisky and drag race!
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by River Rat »

Working tobacco builds some character too. Spent my teen age years chopping tobacco for 10 cents a stick (that's a stick with about 5 plants speared onto it), hanging and stripping for free beer and supper. I'd have my kids doing it if tobacco was still profitable.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by SassyFrass »

Ain't it nifty how many of us farm kids still make a little likker.
Figured I'd set this new jug under the bench for folks to sample. I think its COB, but sharpie wears off glass after a few years and I'm not really sure. Yall try it and if ya like it, have another snort.
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Re: The liar's bench

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Learnt to drive on a tractor about 7 or 8, followed by a Ford pickup that was more rust than body. Both had column shifts, if any you kids know what that was. Not as funny as a Citroen but funny. Learnt to live with heavy gloves on ‘cause hay bails and bailin’ wire bit like hell. Found that picking acres of strawberries was backbreakin’ work, except when you found the snakes in ‘em. Then it was exciting. Sold the berries at 35 cents a quart off the back of that old Ford on the side of the road. Snuck cigarettes and drank stone hard cider from the barn, too. Damn them was FUN years I would not trade for money or sex.
Double, Double, toil and trouble. Fire Burn and pot still bubble.
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Re: The liar's bench

Post by SassyFrass »

Drove quite a few old trucks and cars that was 3 on the tree. Miss those dependable vehicles that I could actually work on. I drove a 64 ford pick up all through high school. Wish I still had that truck.
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Re: The liar's bench

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SassyFrass wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 6:39 pm Drove quite a few old trucks and cars that was 3 on the tree. Miss those dependable vehicles that I could actually work on. I drove a 64 ford pick up all through high school. Wish I still had that truck.
Loved those three on a tree but I really like the seven on the 911

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Re: The liar's bench

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SassyFrass wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 6:39 pm Drove quite a few old trucks and cars that was 3 on the tree. Miss those dependable vehicles that I could actually work on. I drove a 64 ford pick up all through high school. Wish I still had that truck.
That's why I drive a 50 year old truck. I like being able to work on it.

When I open the hood people are shocked and usually say "Look at all the room! I can see the ground around the engine!" Can't say I miss three on the tree though. I find the older I get the less I care for stick shift, which is why my truck has an automatic.
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