Know any outrageous insults?
Moderator: Site Moderator
- kiwi Bruce
- Distiller
- Posts: 2324
- Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2012 12:38 pm
- Location: Transplanted Kiwi living in the States
Know any outrageous insults?
There are some really great insults...I wish I knew more of them
Here's a reasonable kick off...
"If I had a dog with a face like yours I'd shave it's ass and teach it to walk backwards"
so have at it...what you got?
Here's a reasonable kick off...
"If I had a dog with a face like yours I'd shave it's ass and teach it to walk backwards"
so have at it...what you got?
Getting hung up all day on smiles
- Saltbush Bill
- Site Mod
- Posts: 9735
- Joined: Thu Mar 17, 2011 2:13 am
- Location: Northern NSW Australia
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Seen better heads on pimples.
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
A friend called me a helmet-wearing crayon eater.
I responded:
thanks, you smegma gobbling, anal wart sniffing, pus contusion on a gangrene penis,
shit-mongering sack of bloody urine in a baboon's engorged urethra, vomit tossing mouth full of goat diarrhea on a triscuit,
spirochete pants farming gonorrhea black head with a douche back suck fisted inny dick, emitting an aroma of a fecal womb with your decaying twin inside,
rotted cheese and vinegar thigh with stinky maggots crawling into an open festering crotch sore of a dripping green scab in the shadow of a giant encephalitic cross-eyed head,
harboring roach lice colonies.
Haven't heard back.
I responded:
thanks, you smegma gobbling, anal wart sniffing, pus contusion on a gangrene penis,
shit-mongering sack of bloody urine in a baboon's engorged urethra, vomit tossing mouth full of goat diarrhea on a triscuit,
spirochete pants farming gonorrhea black head with a douche back suck fisted inny dick, emitting an aroma of a fecal womb with your decaying twin inside,
rotted cheese and vinegar thigh with stinky maggots crawling into an open festering crotch sore of a dripping green scab in the shadow of a giant encephalitic cross-eyed head,
harboring roach lice colonies.
Haven't heard back.
-
- Master of Distillation
- Posts: 4666
- Joined: Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:48 am
- Location: Northern Victoria, Australia
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
One, I think, from a book by Pearl Buck.
The old Chinese gentleman, of a particularly unattractive lady,
"I have seen a more attractive face under the tail of a water buffalo".
Geoff
The old Chinese gentleman, of a particularly unattractive lady,
"I have seen a more attractive face under the tail of a water buffalo".
Geoff
The Baker
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Dayum fizzix....good thing you went easy on him
- Copperhead road
- Site Donor
- Posts: 494
- Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2017 4:28 pm
- Location: Brisvegas downunder OZ
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
That fat bastard “Has more chins than a Chinese Phone book”
Never mistake kindness for weakness....
- Copperhead road
- Site Donor
- Posts: 494
- Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2017 4:28 pm
- Location: Brisvegas downunder OZ
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
My missus is so skinny she has to run around the shower to get wet!
Never mistake kindness for weakness....
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
What's transparent and lays in the gutter on Lincoln Road ,Henderson, Auckland,New Zealand moaning to itself?
A MAGA cap wearing Seppo with the shit kicked out of it.
A MAGA cap wearing Seppo with the shit kicked out of it.
- Copperhead road
- Site Donor
- Posts: 494
- Joined: Thu Jan 12, 2017 4:28 pm
- Location: Brisvegas downunder OZ
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Not a funny term on a predominantly American Distillers site IMOKiwikeg wrote:Seppo
have a couple of Distilling friends over there who HATE that term.
Although the thread is “outrageous insults” my apologies if I am out of line.
Never mistake kindness for weakness....
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Hahahaha, I actually had to google the term Seppo as I have never heard it before (and I've been called just about every known insult in the book). I'd take that over Yank any day though.
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Rule #5. No politics.
- thecroweater
- retired
- Posts: 6084
- Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2012 9:04 am
- Location: Central Highlands Vic. Australia
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
He's got a head like a boarding house pudding
Head like a half eaten pasty
Ugly as a hat full of busted arse holes
If his brains were dynamite they wouldn't blow his hat off his forehead
God made that bastard as ugly as he could and then smacked him in the face with a sand shoe
That fella's BO would make a maggot yak
Slippery bugger would steal the feathers off a chooks arse
Head like a half eaten pasty
Ugly as a hat full of busted arse holes
If his brains were dynamite they wouldn't blow his hat off his forehead
God made that bastard as ugly as he could and then smacked him in the face with a sand shoe
That fella's BO would make a maggot yak
Slippery bugger would steal the feathers off a chooks arse
Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety. Benjamin Franklin
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
I've seen better faces on iodine bottles
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
HaHaHaa! Another cry for a LIKE button!Shine0n wrote:I've seen better faces on iodine bottles
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Your mother was a hampster and your father smelled of elderberries has always worked well for me
- kiwi Bruce
- Distiller
- Posts: 2324
- Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2012 12:38 pm
- Location: Transplanted Kiwi living in the States
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Her face wouldn't just stop a clock...it'd trigger a time warp!
Getting hung up all day on smiles
- frodo
- Distiller
- Posts: 1727
- Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 11:55 pm
- Location: hiding behind a pine tree. bout 100 miles east of new orleans
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
If someone tells you to kiss their ass
tell them
kiss your own ass, you have a back bone like a dog.
if they get real offended and start acting out.
tell them to
"carry you ass up on that hill yonder, practice falling down,
I'll be along shortly , To make sure you are doing it right "
If that dont get you into a good ole knock down break up furniture fight
only one thing left to do, slap the bastid up side his head and call him a bitch
tell them
kiss your own ass, you have a back bone like a dog.
if they get real offended and start acting out.
tell them to
"carry you ass up on that hill yonder, practice falling down,
I'll be along shortly , To make sure you are doing it right "
If that dont get you into a good ole knock down break up furniture fight
only one thing left to do, slap the bastid up side his head and call him a bitch
- frodo
- Distiller
- Posts: 1727
- Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 11:55 pm
- Location: hiding behind a pine tree. bout 100 miles east of new orleans
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
That girl did not get hit with an ugly stick. someone done whip that ass with the whole tree
- frodo
- Distiller
- Posts: 1727
- Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 11:55 pm
- Location: hiding behind a pine tree. bout 100 miles east of new orleans
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
oh, this done brought back memoriesthecroweater wrote:He's got a head like a boarding house pudding
Head like a half eaten pasty
Ugly as a hat full of busted arse holes
If his brains were dynamite they wouldn't blow his hat off his forehead
God made that bastard as ugly as he could and then smacked him in the face with a sand shoe
That fella's BO would make a maggot yak
Slippery bugger would steal the feathers off a chooks arse
you gator lipped opossum eared fished eyed fool !!!!!!!!!!
- Truckinbutch
- Angel's Share
- Posts: 8107
- Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 12:49 pm
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Jealous ex-husband of the gal I had been out with the night before confronted me in the local bar :
"How did you like that old , used pussy ?"
Me :"Well , Jerry , once I got past that first inch and a half it was all unplowed ground ." ..............
And that's when the fight started ...(True story.)
"How did you like that old , used pussy ?"
Me :"Well , Jerry , once I got past that first inch and a half it was all unplowed ground ." ..............
And that's when the fight started ...(True story.)
If you ain't the lead dog in the team , the scenery never changes . Ga Flatwoods made my avatar and I want to thank him for that .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
hpby98 wrote:Your mother was a hampster and your father smelled of elderberries has always worked well for me
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
How the hell are you the sperm that won?
- shadylane
- Master of Distillation
- Posts: 10399
- Joined: Sat Oct 27, 2007 11:54 pm
- Location: Hiding In the Boiler room of the Insane asylum
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
How's your wife and my kids doing ?
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
Looks like death taking a shit------ Fell outta ugly tree and hit every limb on way down
I use a pot still.Sometimes with a thumper
- Truckinbutch
- Angel's Share
- Posts: 8107
- Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 12:49 pm
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
When some idiot taught you how to write your name you had just been educated beyond your intelligence .
If you ain't the lead dog in the team , the scenery never changes . Ga Flatwoods made my avatar and I want to thank him for that .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
- contrahead
- Trainee
- Posts: 919
- Joined: Mon Dec 30, 2013 3:43 pm
- Location: Southwest
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
A guy once told me he was sitting in a booth or something and overheard a conversation between two women.
One of the women said of a third: “the phone rang and that sperm burping bitch lit out in a heartbeat”.
One of the women said of a third: “the phone rang and that sperm burping bitch lit out in a heartbeat”.
Omnia mea mecum porto
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
'Her eyes dont match, , , ,'
'An ass two axe handles wide'
'An ass two axe handles wide'
Oh,look!! Its a hole in the space-time contuum!!
- Truckinbutch
- Angel's Share
- Posts: 8107
- Joined: Sun Feb 03, 2013 12:49 pm
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
If that boy ever meets a turtle it will be face to face ..... He ain't never gonna pass one .
If you ain't the lead dog in the team , the scenery never changes . Ga Flatwoods made my avatar and I want to thank him for that .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
Don't drink water , fish fornicate in it .
-
- Site Donor
- Posts: 582
- Joined: Fri Aug 03, 2012 10:59 am
- Location: Never one place very long
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
You shoulda been swallowed
The best part of you went running down your mother's leg
The best part of you went running down your mother's leg
- Fruit Squeezer
- Bootlegger
- Posts: 138
- Joined: Mon Jan 30, 2017 6:57 pm
- Location: Left of the Atlantic
Re: Know any outrageous insults?
"Did your ass get bigger, or did your tits shrink?"
~my jaw still hurts to this day~
~my jaw still hurts to this day~