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My father in law keeps saying how much better my rum is after he filters. Without wanting to argue my understanding is that this strips flavors good and bad, whereas as charred wood adds flavoring and strips other flavors. Any comments? I don't want to make the old man cry by telling him his arguments are bunk.

Activated carbon,can remove color,,flavor,,and some tales.(the oils?)
it will not remove,fores,heads or any "bad"alcohols.

Why would his argument be bunk? It's a matter of taste. If he likes what the rum tastes like after activated carbon then what ever it is that it does or doesn't remove makes it better, at least for him.

I prefer to think his opinion is bunk(he feels the same way about mine).

Typical in-law law...