The liar's bench

Post by **Bigbob** » Sun Dec 07, 2014 5:25 pm

Congratulations!

Post by **hamshine** » Sun Dec 07, 2014 7:28 pm

HDNB wrote:didn't know where to post my brag... but absolutely chuffed with my first go at slivovitz. all fruit, wild yeast and 3 months= 3 litres of heaven!

now i have to surreptitiously find some more plum trees for next year! at north of 54* lat, not too many fruit trees around here!

big, shit eatin' grin this stuff is: a) awesome off the spout and b) going to be hard to age.

cheers!

my friend from the check republic just gifted me 20 oz of slivovitz good shiz!!

Post by **moosemilk** » Wed Dec 10, 2014 1:18 am

Waiting on my apple version to finish off still. Got a friend bringing me some back after she goes home for Christmas (Hungary...her dad makes). You got me lickin my lips now, HDNB! Good job!

Post by **Truckinbutch** » Wed Dec 10, 2014 4:55 pm

Flatwoods called me this evening to inquire about the health of my new grandson what was born just a couple hours ahead of his birthday . I was happy to report to him that the youngster was doin well . He weighed nine pounds , nine ounces at birth and weighed eight and a quarter pounds late this afternoon .
>Now , don't nunya go gettin excited over the weight difference . They circumsized him about 11:00 this morning .

Post by **S-Cackalacky** » Wed Dec 10, 2014 5:07 pm

TB, thanks for getting the thread back on topic.

Post by **thecroweater** » Wed Dec 10, 2014 9:51 pm

Had that done to me when i was born TB, Hurt? hell yeah, couldn't walk or talk for 18ths

pretty confident mob my folks getting a 3rd of it cut off before they knew how big it might get

StillLearning1 · Post by **StillLearning1** » Sun Dec 14, 2014 11:21 am

Actual conversation I had at work the other day:

Me: you know how when men are young they are in boy scouts? Then once they grow up a little they turn into eagle scouts?

Friend: yea?

Me: Well what are women called when they grow out of girl scouts?

Friend: (without a pause).... Bitches!

Post by **Truckinbutch** » Fri Dec 19, 2014 7:12 pm

I'm puzzled :
SOH was sprawled in her easy chair this evening with her Blue Heeler pup comfortably lounging in her lap . I walked by on my way to piss and the pup raised her head expectantly and flopped her tail a couple of times . New pup in the house and being made over all the time by SOH she thinks that the world revolves around her .
>My bladder wins that contest hands down .
>Coming back from the bathroom past the recliner chair and the pup raises her head and waggled her tail again . And SOH says ,
"Oh , Daddy ..... , aren't you going to give the baby some attention ?"
>So I scratched her behind the ears a bit and patted her head . She was sooo pleased and snuggled back down into SOH's lap and I headed for my chair to get back on line here .
>Not to happen ! SOH grabbed my shirt tail and pulled me back to her chair .
"Not so fast , Mister . That puppy isn't the only one that needs some attention ."...................
>So , I dropped my hand down and rubbed her behind the ears and patted her on the head ..................... Was that wrong ?
>Last I saw of her was the cheeks of her ass slapping together as she and both our dogs headed for the bedroom rapidly . There was a 'sunnybitch' shouted over her shoulder before the bedroom door slammed shut .
>Oh , well ....... I can make a few more posts here without being disturbed now ...........

Post by **T-Pee** » Fri Dec 19, 2014 9:39 pm

I got kicked out of Boy Scouts for eating Brownies.

tp

Post by **firewater69** » Fri Dec 19, 2014 9:57 pm

tp ( my hero)

Post by **Truckinbutch** » Fri Dec 19, 2014 10:51 pm

T-Pee wrote:I got kicked out of Boy Scouts for eating Brownies.

tp

Foolish child . Either you wasn't sneakin enough and got caught or you was too stoopid to keep your mouth shut about it and got caught . Them Brownies wasn't apt to tell if it was something they liked .

Post by **T-Pee** » Fri Dec 19, 2014 11:08 pm

Noisy Brownies.

tp

Post by **moosemilk** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 12:49 am

Dammit, I hope somebody here has a jug of something good to cool me down. I was watching TV and this commercial comes on for Victoria secret. Said all panties were 50% off. So I rush down to the store and was pretty upset at what I saw. Nevermind 50% off, every woman in there was fully clothed!

***spitooooooh***

ga flatwoods · Post by **ga flatwoods** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 10:20 am

That's pretty good there Moose! Cant have the likes of you running hound dog style in the mall. Here take of shot of this Taz Whiskey o mine and let me put you on the trail of a hot doe!
Ga Flatwoods

Post by **S-Cackalacky** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 11:11 am

Glad to see the bench is finally gettin' a good butt dustin'.

Post by **moosemilk** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 12:41 pm

Thanks, flatwoods. Much appreciated. I was a little worked up from the scent after 12 hours of running yesterday, and then that false advertising almost got the best of me. Was even up early so I could stare at the crack of dawn.

Post by **heartcut** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 3:51 pm

Up in the Rockies with the family for Christmas and we're feeding a mob. Five rugrats running full speed ahead and stopping only for food and video games. Teenagers and young adults dropping by. A really old Pitt Bull and a really young Chihuahua add to the commotion
When they finally crash, there's the Bourbon, Scotch and Rum we brought along. Life is good.
Eating Brownies, eh? If God hadn't meant for pussy to be eaten He wouldn't have made them look like tacos.

cob · Post by **cob** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 8:20 pm

back before dirt i was in the boy scouts and found the
best way to make fire was rubbing two girl scouts together.

Post by **Truckinbutch** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 9:07 pm

Show me a man that won't whistle in the canyon and I'll show you how to break up his home

ga flatwoods · Post by **ga flatwoods** » Mon Dec 22, 2014 11:47 pm

You a dirty ole bastard TB ! Flatwoods says grinning like TB's mule

Post by **moosemilk** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 1:12 am

ga flatwoods wrote: You a dirty ole bastard TB ! Flatwoods says grinning like TB's mule

Damn you flatwoods. You jus get me all settled down with that taz whisky and now your avatar got me Goin again. I almost thought you were Jimbo at first, sportin that kind of a pic!

Tokoroa_Shiner · Post by **Tokoroa_Shiner** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 1:36 am

heartcut wrote:If God hadn't meant for pussy to be eaten He wouldn't have made them look like tacos.

A bit like eating ribs. If it's not all around your mouth, ya doin it wrong.

ga flatwoods · Post by **ga flatwoods** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 11:28 am

I caught enough fog today to have the water needed for my next mash, none of it rain!
Ga Flatwoods

Post by **Truckinbutch** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 11:34 am

ga flatwoods wrote:I caught enough fog today to have the water needed for my next mash, none of it rain!
Ga Flatwoods

How'd ya do that ? Did ya shift your garden fogger into reverse ?

Post by **S-Cackalacky** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 5:54 pm

Hard sayin's now is it? But, can't think of one at the moment.

ga flatwoods · Post by **ga flatwoods** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 6:02 pm

Put two 2x2 in a 55 gallon bucket with a sheet of plastic between the two draining into the bucket.
Ga Flatwoods

Post by **Richard7** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 6:35 pm

flatwoods you ain't fooling nobody, you threw a hose pipe in that bucket and filled her up!....... Now that I think about it you probably Put two 2x2 in a 55 gallon bucket with a sheet of plastic between the two draining into the bucket.
LOL

ga flatwoods · Post by **ga flatwoods** » Tue Dec 23, 2014 11:35 pm

Someone is impersonating Richard7! He hasnt been around in forever! How did they get his avatar?

Post by **thecroweater** » Wed Dec 24, 2014 6:40 am

ga flatwoods wrote:I caught enough fog today to have the water needed for my next mash, none of it rain!
Ga Flatwoods

Yeah this cold wet place , reckon ya could syphon the fog into a bucket for mash water, not much need with it raining every other day though. not so back home, we get dry fog we call smoke is all. hell last two times it hailed they got that darn dry ice. Pretty dry country, heard the old fellas say durring that 40 days and 40 nights down pour we got 13 and a half points back home and kids were running up and down the drive looking for the burst main

Post by **heartcut** » Wed Dec 24, 2014 3:35 pm

Had a rain in '82 in Northern California where a catfish asked me for a towel.

Home Distiller

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