Cheez-its

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:07 pm

I've been cleaning my garage over the past few days and have finally caught up on most of my running. Only 1 neutral run away from being out of things to run, I have about 15 gallons of wash not yet finished and room to do some more now. While cleaning at the garage I found 15 boxes of Cheez-it crackers that I had forgotten about.

Some years ago I got a hell of a deal on several cases of Cheez-its at a cost of less than the price of a single box per case. I wound up with so many Cheez-its that I got tired of them and ran out of people to give them to so a case +3 boxes got forgotten and left in a cabinet until yesterday. Now I have 15 boxes of expired Cheez-its and hate the thought of throwing them out.

So now I'm thinking about seeing if they can be fermented or possibly use the method I used the other week and make a birdwatchers then as it nears finishing add in a couple boxes of ground up cheez-its, let it settle for a week or two, run it and see what happens.

What do you guys think?

woodshed · Post by **woodshed** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:09 pm

Go for it. And keep us posted. May be too many chemicals but you don't know without trying.

Post by **Tater** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:11 pm

what does the ingredients list say?

Post by **shadylane** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:27 pm

Artificial food with cheese like substitute.
Sorry couldn't help myself.

Post by **jedneck** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:32 pm

Feed them to the mice, rats, coons , possums and anything else that will eat them. I can't stand the smell of fake cheese. I think I would rather ferment horse shit.

Post by **Jimbo** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:35 pm

That has MCH all over it. Give them to him to make a sister brew to his Froot Loops!

woodshed · Post by **woodshed** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:40 pm

Jimbo wrote:That has MCH all over it. Give them to him to make a sister brew to his Froot Loops!

That covers breakfast and lunch. Now if someone can figure out how to ferment pork chops

Post by **Jimbo** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:44 pm

Don't give him any ideas. I bet mc is looking at pork shoulder and pork butts scratching his head right now wonderin which will take to earth roasted taters and the wild yeast scraped off a sheep's vulva better.

Post by **jedneck** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 3:45 pm

woodshed wrote:
Jimbo wrote:That has MCH all over it. Give them to him to make a sister brew to his Froot Loops!
That covers breakfast and lunch. Now if someone can figure out how to ferment pork chops

I'd rather ferment sugar. Me likes some chops. Pigs get the spent grain so I do ferment pork chop.

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:07 pm

Ingredients
Enriched flower, vegetable oil, real cheese, salt, paprika, yeast, paprika oleoresin for color and soy lecethin.
That's it and you might note the cheese is real not imitation. It does have MCH written all over it but he inspires me to try different things so that's why I thought about it.

Post by **Tater** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:08 pm

Id mix it

with malted rye for a pepperjack likker

Post by **rad14701** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:14 pm

Might be worth a shot but those Cheeze-Its probably have more oils and fats than you might think... I was shocked by how much there was when I did Graham Cracker SMOP...

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:19 pm

rad14701 wrote:Might be worth a shot but those Cheeze-Its probably have more oils and fats than you might think... I was shocked by how much there was when I did Graham Cracker SMOP...

That was why I was thinking about adding them at the end of a birdwatchers ferment rather than trying to actually ferment them outright.

Post by **S-Cackalacky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:20 pm

Oily likker - hell, should go down nice and smooth.

Post by **Jimbo** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:23 pm

Does the oil hurt anything? It ain't gonna come over in the vapor?

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:24 pm

I figure it will help keep foaming down

Post by **Tater** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:25 pm

rad14701 wrote:Might be worth a shot but those Cheeze-Its probably have more oils and fats than you might think... I was shocked by how much there was when I did Graham Cracker SMOP...

Yep a lot of oil. In the oatmeal cookies i did they had oil in them also .In one the pics you can see oil floating on top.It fermented out well and was a easy run.

Post by **shadylane** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:30 pm

cranky wrote:Ingredients
Enriched flower, vegetable oil, real cheese, salt, paprika, yeast, paprika oleoresin for color and soy lecethin.

Are you going to use the cheez-its for nutrients in a sugar head ?
Or are you going to use malt or enzymes for conversion ?

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:40 pm

shadylane wrote:
cranky wrote:Ingredients
Enriched flower, vegetable oil, real cheese, salt, paprika, yeast, paprika oleoresin for color and soy lecethin.
Are you going to use the cheez-its for nutrients in a sugar head ?
Or are you going to use malt or enzymes for conversion ?

I'm debating that, I have the enzymes but think I may just use them as a flavor additive or nutrients.

jb-texshine · Post by **jb-texshine** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 4:49 pm

fruity pebbles were oily as hell...also took twenty something days to ferment...

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:10 pm

I seldom run anything that hasn't set for 30 days or more, I think it adds to the final product to have a long slow ferment and plenty of time to clear on it's own.

MooseKnuckle · Post by **MooseKnuckle** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:19 pm

What are you making with this? a neutral or a cheese-it flavoured liquor of sorts? Because the second one to me sounds like it might just be all kinds of wrong... I could be wrong myself, but I don't think this would be good unless you pulled ALL the flavour out, and in that case, sugar would be much easier and better... Now I had a rum ferment that had a bit of a cheese funk to it that actually turned out pretty amazing, although running the tails was enough to make me want to puke, so you may be surprised anyway.

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:39 pm

MooseKnuckle wrote:What are you making with this? a neutral or a cheese-it flavoured liquor of sorts? Because the second one to me sounds like it might just be all kinds of wrong... I could be wrong myself, but I don't think this would be good unless you pulled ALL the flavour out, and in that case, sugar would be much easier and better... Now I had a rum ferment that had a bit of a cheese funk to it that actually turned out pretty amazing, although running the tails was enough to make me want to puke, so you may be surprised anyway.

The idea is to make a spirit with the essence of Cheez-its, it would be pointless to use it for neutral. Is it wrong? Hell yes but I figure it will be one of those fun things to do just because. It's the kind of goofy things I like to do.

MooseKnuckle · Post by **MooseKnuckle** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:48 pm

I'm just picturing the funk that filled my house when I got into the cheesy tails of that one rum. But like I said the rum was pretty damn good, so you never know what may happen. A complete waste of time, the best damn thing you've ever tasted, or something somewhere in between lol. You may just pick up on some crazy flavour you never would have thought could exist in a cheeze-it. But the best way to find out what the hell it's going to do is to make one small batch of pure cheeze-it, and keep some for adding into other ferments as you said. See which is better

Post by **cranky** » Thu Jul 23, 2015 5:55 pm

rockchucker22 wrote:I just puked a little bit. Sorry Cranky among all your good ideas one has to fail eventually. This may be it.

Oh I know but it will at least be entertaining, just think how much fun this thread has been so far!

Post by **Swedish Pride** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 1:11 am

Only the flour to convert right?
you may not get a lot out of it but I'd go "AG" on it.
I do like cheese but cheese liker

Only time will tell for sure, and yeah I was thinking MCH as well when I saw the title

Post by **skow69** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 6:09 am

Pick up some bacon flavored vodka and you're half way to an omelet.

Post by **Jimbo** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 6:15 am

MCH is mysteriously absent from this thread.....

Post by **MichiganCornhusker** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 7:16 am

Jimbo wrote:MCH is mysteriously absent from this thread.....

Y'all talkin' in front of my back!
Ha, lots of MCH talk goin on here! Damn, I try to keep up on EVERY post, but I had avoided the Cheeze-Itz deliberately because I don't need anymore crazy ass ideas. I bumped into Hound Dog talking about clover shaped flute columns the other day, and now I have that rattling around in my head.

If I had paid attention and seen that it was Cranky, a master at work, I would have checked this out sooner. It was actually Shady posting the Notable quote that got me looking.
I love it, Cranky, go for it. A nice snifter of Cheez Brandy with a plate full of Ritz crackers sounds like a real treat to me.

cranky wrote:The idea is to make a spirit with the essence of Cheez-its, it would be pointless to use it for neutral.

Now that is some funny shite right there.

Continue to boldly blaze your own trail, Crank!

Post by **DSM Loki** » Fri Jul 24, 2015 11:15 am

I say do it up AG style. Worst case you can say you made likker from cheezeits, but it may end up tasty.

Home Distiller

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